Old fashioned clean jokes
Re: Old fashioned clean jokes
Nice one Kev...and there's extra in it for Pratchett fans like me and Plaques - he'll recognise unintended references in that to at least two Discworld characters!
Nullius in verba: On the word of no one (Motto of the Royal Society)
Re: Old fashioned clean jokes
I took Kev's joke in a more literal manner, no imagination that's me. but now you have given me the hint my guess is ....
Angua von Überwald = Wolf.
Detritus = Granite
I suppose at a push Cherry Longbottom = Malapropism.
Re: Old fashioned clean jokes
Spot on! 
Nullius in verba: On the word of no one (Motto of the Royal Society)
Re: Old fashioned clean jokes
This one is a little bit naughty...
A husband asked his wife if he was the only one she’d ever been with.
She considered this and replied,
“Yes. The rest were all sevens and eights.”
A husband asked his wife if he was the only one she’d ever been with.
She considered this and replied,
“Yes. The rest were all sevens and eights.”
I know I'm in my own little world, but it's OK... they know me here. 
Re: Old fashioned clean jokes
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Kev
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Re: Old fashioned clean jokes
Oh dear.I know I'm in my own little world, but it's OK... they know me here.
Re: Old fashioned clean jokes
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Kev
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Stanley
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Re: Old fashioned clean jokes
I like both of them!
Stanley Challenger Graham
Stanley's View
scg1936 at talktalk.net
"Beware of certitude" (Jimmy Reid)
The floggings will continue until morale improves!
Stanley's View
scg1936 at talktalk.net
"Beware of certitude" (Jimmy Reid)
The floggings will continue until morale improves!
Re: Old fashioned clean jokes
You have two seconds to find the mouse.
.
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Re: Old fashioned clean jokes
Wasn't sure whether this was a joke or social history 
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Kev
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Stanley
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Re: Old fashioned clean jokes
Largely social history Kev, all of them true. Bit still funny to reflect.......
Stanley Challenger Graham
Stanley's View
scg1936 at talktalk.net
"Beware of certitude" (Jimmy Reid)
The floggings will continue until morale improves!
Stanley's View
scg1936 at talktalk.net
"Beware of certitude" (Jimmy Reid)
The floggings will continue until morale improves!
Re: Old fashioned clean jokes
I can relate to most of those 50’s observations.
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I know I'm in my own little world, but it's OK... they know me here.
Re: Old fashioned clean jokes
Sue Perkins during the latest Just a Minute episode noted that the energy company PowerGen formed an Italian subsidiary and called it PowerGen Italia!
Nullius in verba: On the word of no one (Motto of the Royal Society)
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Stanley
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- Joined: 23 Jan 2012, 12:01
- Location: Barnoldswick. Nearer to Heaven than Gloria.
Re: Old fashioned clean jokes
I like it.... .
.Stanley Challenger Graham
Stanley's View
scg1936 at talktalk.net
"Beware of certitude" (Jimmy Reid)
The floggings will continue until morale improves!
Stanley's View
scg1936 at talktalk.net
"Beware of certitude" (Jimmy Reid)
The floggings will continue until morale improves!
Re: Old fashioned clean jokes
How do you find out if someone is vegan?
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Nullius in verba: On the word of no one (Motto of the Royal Society)
Re: Old fashioned clean jokes
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Stanley
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Re: Old fashioned clean jokes
I'm with Kev on both of those.
Stanley Challenger Graham
Stanley's View
scg1936 at talktalk.net
"Beware of certitude" (Jimmy Reid)
The floggings will continue until morale improves!
Stanley's View
scg1936 at talktalk.net
"Beware of certitude" (Jimmy Reid)
The floggings will continue until morale improves!
Re: Old fashioned clean jokes
Teaching English in China?
On his 70th birthday, a man was given a gift certificate from his wife. The certificate was for a consultation with an Indian medicine man living on a nearby reservation who was rumoured to have a simple cure for erectile dysfunction.
The husband went to the reservation and saw the medicine man. The old Indian gave him a potion and, with a grip on his shoulder, warned 'This is a powerful medicine. You take only a teaspoonful, and then say: '1-2-3'. When you do, you will become more manly than you have ever been in your life, and you can perform for as long as you want."
The man thanked the old Indian, and as he walked away, he turned and asked: "How do I stop the medicine from working?"
"Your partner must say '1-2-3-4' he responded, "but when she does, the medicine will not work again until the next full moon."
He was very eager to see if it worked, so he went home, showered, shaved, took a spoonful of the medicine, and then invited his wife to join him in the bedroom. When she came in, he took off his clothes and said: "1-2-3!"
Immediately, he was the manliest of men. His wife was excited and began throwing off her clothes, and asked: "What was the 1-2-3 for?"
And that, boys and girls, is why we should never end our sentences with a preposition, because we could end up with a dangling participle.
On his 70th birthday, a man was given a gift certificate from his wife. The certificate was for a consultation with an Indian medicine man living on a nearby reservation who was rumoured to have a simple cure for erectile dysfunction.
The husband went to the reservation and saw the medicine man. The old Indian gave him a potion and, with a grip on his shoulder, warned 'This is a powerful medicine. You take only a teaspoonful, and then say: '1-2-3'. When you do, you will become more manly than you have ever been in your life, and you can perform for as long as you want."
The man thanked the old Indian, and as he walked away, he turned and asked: "How do I stop the medicine from working?"
"Your partner must say '1-2-3-4' he responded, "but when she does, the medicine will not work again until the next full moon."
He was very eager to see if it worked, so he went home, showered, shaved, took a spoonful of the medicine, and then invited his wife to join him in the bedroom. When she came in, he took off his clothes and said: "1-2-3!"
Immediately, he was the manliest of men. His wife was excited and began throwing off her clothes, and asked: "What was the 1-2-3 for?"
And that, boys and girls, is why we should never end our sentences with a preposition, because we could end up with a dangling participle.
-
Stanley
- Global Moderator
- Posts: 90695
- Joined: 23 Jan 2012, 12:01
- Location: Barnoldswick. Nearer to Heaven than Gloria.
Re: Old fashioned clean jokes
I think I understand that joke.....
Stanley Challenger Graham
Stanley's View
scg1936 at talktalk.net
"Beware of certitude" (Jimmy Reid)
The floggings will continue until morale improves!
Stanley's View
scg1936 at talktalk.net
"Beware of certitude" (Jimmy Reid)
The floggings will continue until morale improves!