Old fashioned clean jokes

[Stanley]

[Cathy]

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[Stanley]

[Stanley]

[Stanley]

[Stanley]

[Cathy]

A recent study has found that women who carry a little extra weight...
live longer than the men who mention it.

[Stanley]

[Big Kev]

[Big Kev]

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[Tripps]

Known in this house as 'Abanazar'- a small select audience of one here though. Personally I wouldn't let him in the same room as the till let alone give him access to it. I've posted this before - but 'lest we forget'
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As a Question Time regular, Puffins are familiar with Nadhim Zahawi, Conservative MP for Stratford-on-Avon and Minister for Covid Vaccine Delivery. Previously we have learned of Mr Zahawi’s £25 million property empire, his well-paid connections with the Caribbean tax havens and Kurdish Iraq’s oil concessions, and his horses having their stables heated on his Westminster expenses.

Following his January 6th appearance on Question Time (the review being published on the 7th) the QT Review spotlight illuminated Warren Medical, a company set up in June 2020 at the height of the coronavirus pandemic. Warren Medical’s three company directors were Mr Zahawi’s wife, confusingly declaring herself as Ms Lana Fawsi Jamil Saib, and two of Mr Zahawi’s sons, confusingly declaring themselves as Jaafar Shanshal and Ahman Shanshal. Even more confusingly, the Zahawi’s family interest in the medical business was not declared in Nadhim Zahawi’s December 2020 list of parliamentary interests.

Interestingly, the subsequent Minister for Vaccine Deployment’s family had no previous medical experience other than, in the interests of equality of opportunity, Jaafar Shanshal having been employed as a researcher by Health Secretary Matt Hancock.

May QT Review claim a scalp? Signed and dated documents lodged at Companies House show that the day after QT Review was published, January 8th 2021, Ms Saib and Messrs Shanshal applied to have Warren Medical struck off the company’s register and be dissolved.
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Zahawi's various roles resulted in his reportedly being the second highest earning MP in the UK as of 2017.[20]
The Guardian reported in early 2017 that Zahawi had spent £25m buying property around London, for both personal and commercial use.[21] Zahawi said in response that "My first priority, before anything else, is my constituency work and I would never, or have never, let anything get in the way of this."[21] By 2021, it was reported that Zahawi or his wife owned £100 million in property, including an industrial estate, three properties in London, a country house with stables in Warwickshire and a property in Dubai.

[Tripps]

Sorry for that indulgence - back to good clean jokes

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[Tizer]

All very good!

[Cathy]

[Stanley]

[David, your note about Zahawi is not off piste. It's a joke.... ]

[Cathy]

Tripps

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Awww Are you smiling?

[Cathy]

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Maybe this one will bring a smile...

[Stanley]

[Big Kev]

Citroen Picasso

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[Stanley]

That is very clever!

[plaques]

With weddings back in vogue most people will have gone through this mill but never nothing like this.

[Big Kev]

[Big Kev]

As we now have Charles III, can we start a campaign for the Royal Mail to be renamed C3PO?

[PanBiker]

I would go with that. The term Jedi as a replacement for the religious persuasion on censuses and other official documentation has increased exponentially over the last 50 years.

It would have the downside though of no strike action as it wouldn't be correct protocol.

[Stanley]

I loved the Youtube vid of the wedding photographer.